can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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