i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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