Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
