He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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