i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
