The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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