Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
