What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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