either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize