she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Is it because I queefed?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize