she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
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worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
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We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?