i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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