this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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