OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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