I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize