I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize