she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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