Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
