And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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