I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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