During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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