I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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