I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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