Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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