I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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