Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
