we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
