I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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