didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
She's the barista slut.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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