I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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