I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
