I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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