wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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