Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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