Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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