Hey man sorry I got all grabby
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize