Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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