I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
