i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
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