Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
