I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize