she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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