Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
