I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
