Whod you bang
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
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I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
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Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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