nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
did i walk over a car last night?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
