Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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