I think my vagina is haunted
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
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My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
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