u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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