I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
