I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
