I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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